Dr. Richard De La Garza | Therapist for Men

Therapy for men, leaders and veterans navigating life changes, the hardest part is not the transition, it’s the loss of steadiness and identity, and I’m here to help you change that

You want to feel like yourself again and take charge of your life, but you’re unsure where to begin

You’ve tried pushing through, numbing your feelings, “sucking it up,” or following generic self-help advice, but none of these approaches address the real issue: how your sense of identity, your nervous system, and your role can feel scrambled after all you’ve endured and after everything that’s been demanded of you by the systems around you.

You’re not alone, and you don’t have to navigate this on your own. I can help you slow down and identify what’s truly happening in your body, your story, and your environment, so we can work together to create a path forward that honors your lived experience that empowers you to lead your life with the same care you offer others.

For a long time...

I moved through life on autopilot overworking, taking on too much, and quietly ignoring my own limits.

I believed it was my responsibility to carry everything for everyone else. Like you, I thought, “If I just push harder, stay tougher, and don’t complain, things will work out.” But beneath the surface, my sense of self felt scrambled and my nervous system was always on edge. I dwelled on survival mode. 

The turning point came when I realized there was nothing “wrong” with me. My reactions were a natural response to chronic pressure, trauma, and environments that expect self-sacrifice. Through studying Paulo Freire, learning about nervous system science, and listening to veterans’ stories, I discovered that healing isn’t about fixing a broken person. 

Instead, it’s about recognizing what’s really happening, honoring your strengths, and reclaiming your role as the leader of your own life. 

This realization now guides the way I work with veterans and military-connected service members who find themselves in a similar place.

You may think you have to “suck it up,” stay tough, and handle everything alone, but that’s not true. Your strength and leadership are not defined by doing it all yourself

You might feel frustrated or even ashamed for still feeling on edge, disconnected, or stuck in old patterns, especially after trying to ignore your needs, overwork, or follow generic advice that didn’t consider your real life, culture, or circumstances. It's like always the same grind over and over again without peace.

Like many veterans and military-connected individuals I’ve worked with, you might find yourself blaming yourself, downplaying your experiences, or hoping things will magically “settle down.” Instead, naming what’s really happening and seeking support that truly respects your experience and leadership is what makes the difference.

Here’s what I believe:  You are a leader, and your reactions, pain, and patterns make sense given what you’ve experienced and the systems you’ve navigated. There is nothing random or “broken” about you

With the right tools, honest support, and a judgment-free space to express your reality, you can feel grounded in your own skin again, calm your nervous system, and lead your life with clarity and intention.



My purpose is to help you understand what’s truly happening in your body, your story, and your environment, so you can reclaim your calm, your identity, and your leadership. This will empower you to build a life that reflects who you are now, not just who you were conditioned to be.

My approach is rooted in nervous system science, Paulo Freire’s liberatory pedagogy, and hands-on experience with veterans and military-connected individuals. 

I’m direct, calm, and deeply curious. I won’t sugarcoat challenges, nor will I pathologize responses that make sense in your context. I’m here to stand beside you, not above you, as you reclaim leadership in your own life.

Why should you trust me? Because the people I work with consistently:

• Feel more grounded and less on-edge in their daily lives
• Understand their patterns without shame or self-blame
• Navigate relationships and systems with clearer boundaries and more agency
• Reconnect with a sense of purpose and identity that isn’t defined only by service or survival
• 
  

This is the work we’ll do together grounded in your unique reality, not in one-size-fits-all advice.

My name is Dr. Richard De La Garza, and I’m a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), Mexican American / Chicano

My professional calling grew out of a passion for Paulo Freire, nervous system science, and the lived experiences of veterans and military-connected communities. I started this practice because I was frustrated by the shallow, one-size-fits-all advice often given to veterans—advice that overlooks culture, leadership, and the complex systems they navigate.



I hold a Bachelor’s degree from San Jose State University, a Master’s degree in Public Administration from Columbia University, and a Doctorate in Philosophy of Leadership from the University of San Diego. My research and clinical work center multicultural experiences of first-generation, non-traditional, veteran, and disabled individuals, grounded in social justice and culturally competent care.

More about me

Since starting my practice, I’ve partnered with a multitude of men, veterans and military-connected folks to move from “constantly on alert and overloaded” to feeling more regulated in their bodies, clearer about their boundaries, and more grounded in who they are beyond roles and rank

My background includes serving in the U.S. Army as a direct commissioned officer working with active-duty servicemembers, providing consultation for a non-profit board of directors, case management within a community mental health clinic, and facilitating government partnerships across the military and VA Palo Alto.

I work from a holistic, integrative approach that includes person-centered, psychodynamic, narrative, cognitive-behavioral, solution-oriented, systems-based, and storytelling modalities. I am also trained in EMDR therapy.

You don’t have to keep white-knuckling it, carrying everything in silence, or trying to “fix” yourself alone inside systems that were never built with your wholeness in mind

Let’s slow down, name what’s really happening in your body and your world,  reflecting together on the forces shaping your life and taking concrete, life-giving actions, so you can build a grounded, more liberated way of living where you can lead, love, and rest without burning yourself out.

Ready to get started?

Book a call with me, and let’s enter into the kind of dialogue that makes new possibilities real.

“It is impossible to teach without the courage to love.”— Paulo Freire, Pedagogy of Freedom